Sunday, August 25, 2013

Leftistic

Just watched a interview on TV with a Mom of a autistic child.  I was watching both sides of her face and in comparison to many people in my view she was remarkably expressive on both sides.. She made a point that autism is mostly about communication deficits. That the child does not make the connection to the parents or others.

Creating autistic monkeys

I am wondering if my left side is somewhat similar to autism. I cannot easily imagine/connect to the persona of a person on the left side. I think I fall in the normal range and the issue is undoubtedly far more complex than I am suggesting. If my sense of the Mom above is correct then that further weakens my ideas. However I believe my favoritism of my right side to the neglect of my left is that it is connected in the way I relate to others.

Friday, August 23, 2013

Danny boy

Danny boy

Nice version of Danny boy by Sinead O Connor.  As I tend not to relate to the left side of the face with right side of her face in the dark I think I tend to listen to the sound of her voice more than if the right side of her face was lit.

However it is a good video for me to watch if I am trying to see the left side as part of someone to relate to. There is a different feel on the left side of my face as I try to read her left side of face. It takes effort on my part to imagine a personality behind the beauty of her face and song while I watch.

PS

After watching some more with my right eye shut and looking for the persona on the left I am struck by the size of my deficit in being able to see her manifested in the left side of her face.

Sweet Molly Malone

Another song with a nice close up where on a few occasions I can actually imagine a persona on the left that I relate to. Almost like for my left side to develop I need the perception of another person on their left side for it to start.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Am I wrong about the 'left tongue'?

I feel the musculature under the tongue which I believe to be the extrinsic muscles in a way that I never did before.  There is a differentiation between the left and right musculature and I can ask one side to contract and the other to relax. It feels like I usually keep the left side more contracted than the right. Feeling these muscles move and relax independently may have given me the feeling of having a 'left tongue' but when I move to the intrinsic tongue musculature and surface of the tongue,  I am not as clear with the differentiation of the left and right. In other words I may be wrong about the idea of the 'left tongue'. I still cannot get what I feel to be the left tongue to move in a way that says I am doing what I think I am doing. I have delayed posting this as it is somewhat embarrassing even though there is a high possibility that the only person reading this is myself.  I keep playing with what feels to be the left tongue but when I check it by moving the tongue normally the locations do not line up. I am not totally convinced I am wrong. I am planning on to keep on playing with my possible non existent 'left tongue' and see where it leads.




Sunday, August 18, 2013

Eye to eye

Walking on the trails again. I have been observing the left eye and face of others as we pass on the right. The feeling that I do not really see the left side of face spontaneously or even relate to that side as being a person seems more and more self evident. On the surface it would seem easy to differentiate what I am doing. The assumption I always have had was of course I relate to a person as a left and right side. The reality is I do not. I see the right side as the person I relate to.  I do not think this is true of everyone but again I think I fall in a normal range. I may look at the left side of ten people's face and only get the gestalt of one as a individual personality. Even though I am looking at the left my prejudice is that right side is the "person". It is much harder for me than it would seem to be.

It feels like this is the basis for my right handedness and the dominance of the right tongue. There is a strong connection of my left tongue and left eye but I am unclear to the origin or mechanics. Spontaneous movement of one feels to be reflected in the other. The movements feel foreign, somewhat spastic, limited in control but more powerful in the limited range than would seem possible because if I switch back to the normal 'right' side control they cease to exist.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Full of bunk

One half the brain not stronger than the other

The report in the news of the study does suggest some lateralization in speech. However the tone of the report is somewhat at odds with what I think I am feeling and saying. The way I use the left tongue face and eye feels dramatically different than I do with the right.  My guess is the study's author would suggest that I am full of bunk at best

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

For the dogs a smile

I grew up without a dog in the family. Dogs to me as a kid were things that went psycho as I tried to deliver the paper. Many people used dogs to guard their property and some let them run wild in the neighborhood. I liked the dogs that were friendly but was afraid of most. I learned to relate to dogs better after we got one for our daughter.

Many people walking on the trails have the dogs on leash. I find myself looking and smiling at the dogs from a distance. Somehow after looking at the left side of peoples faces I tend to relate to the dogs better. I see them as individuals with distinct personalities instead of just a dog.  Smiling at other people's dog often engages the people walking them. It goes unsaid but somehow a revelation to me the almost unconscious signals that I send other people influences how they relate to me.

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Do I keep posting?

Do I give up on the left tongue?

Went for a walk on the trail again last night.  Trying to connect and read the left side of the people we (wife and I) met coming down the trail. At a long distance I have very little clue by observing the left eye and face who they are or what they are feeling. My sense by observing the right side I can come to some sort of conclusion even though I may be wrong. At a certain point some people react to my 'left smile' and then I see them in a sense come alive for me on the left side of their face.

Many people are exercising, talking or engrossed in their own thoughts so it is difficult/useless to make generalizations about others but I can observe my own perceptions and easily jump to the not 'right' conclusion. The way I relate to others has an immense influence on my posture and the use of my head, spine etc..  I am in a sense one sided because I see others as one sided.

I do not know of anyone else talking about this. I may be wrong but I will keep exploring it, playing with my 'left tongue' while wandering down the 'sinister' path of life.

Saturday, August 3, 2013

Serious doubt

Still cannot move the 'left tongue' across the midline. It is creating serious doubt about my ideas and thinking.
There is a great possibility I am simply wrong about everything. .

Friday, August 2, 2013

Back to back

Back of tongues

In the view of the tongue linked above I am looking at the root or back of tongue looking forward. The tongue lies above the epiglottis. It is always surprising to me how thick it is.  I can see the greater cornu of the hyoid peaking out on the left side at the same height as mid epiglottis in this view.  My understanding is that when I swallow the hyoid elevates and the epiglottis closes over the glottis preventing food from entering the airway.

I am trying to have the left tongue move forward relax and hollow while having the right tongue harden and come back. In doing so I feel the musculature and structures of the anterior throat trying to mirror the action. In the back I can feel changes all the way down the posterior spine to the pelvis. It feels like the use of my spine is a reflection of my tongues.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Left side face discount

Walking on the bike path today. Weather was great. I am trying to see other peoples and relate to other people's left side of face from a fairly good distance away. Even though I am deliberately trying to look only at the left side of people's face, my tendency is to see only the right side. A person may be thirty yards out and I am already reading who they are based on what I see only on their right side. I discount the left side almost if it is not human or that it does not exist. I relate to others only as a half person. I have to deliberately try and scan the left side and almost guess what I do naturally in seeing the right.

I believe I am originating a 'left' smile better than I ever have and it occasionally shocks me how much better some people relate to it. More than once I have been surprised at the friendliness of a person that I do not think I would have made a connection with before if I was only showing my usual 'right' smile.